House-wife, home-maker, stay-at-home-mom, Mrs. {husband's-name}...call whatever you want, it all leads to one thing - "you don't have your own identity". Family members and relatives started adding my husband's name as soon as I got married (doesn't matter whether I changed my name or not).
I have NO issues with the profession (being mom, wife, etc.), except with the name calling (like above) and no remuneration from the job - in the currency that modern world can recognize - btw, that is money in this century; we left behind bartering system of olden days long time back :-) Well, don't think a working-mom/working-wife gets it any easier - she still doesn't get a deserved social existence.
Of course, I can gain my own identity/social-existence by doing - say - invent things and make sure it is actually credited to my name (Marie Curie); start a company (Meg Whitman); become a queen of a country (Elizabeth II) or become an exceptionally famous actress (won't help if I marry another actor), etc. In that case, probably, I will gain the social existence equivalent to any male that exists; but still my husband won't be called after my name! (No, I don't need it to be so; just saying).
There used to be ration-card system in India. My name had to be removed from my father's card and must be put in my father-in-law's card….long story short...consequence of this I couldn't vote...never happened while l lived there. May be a transfer of house-title/sale-deed happens much faster !
One thing I realized that if you are a go-with-the-flow kind of person, this identity crisis won't bother you - so you are a happy camper and you wonder why people like me are stirring up the dust. But for me, this social norm is like a slow burning coal inside me. My logic is male and female should co-exist and nobody is superior or inferior to the other party. Divide the labor and respect what each party does.
A Mr. is a Mr. from birth to death. But a girl is like...well you know the list of suffixes. I did change my last name, eventually - just so I can get away with the extra explaining I had to do in various situations - like once in a hotel, in India, I was asked to book a different room as my name didn't go with my husband's name! And did I tell you I have a very short temper ? ...so you know what happened afterwards :-)
At least, I have it easier in this country...energy saved is utilized in a better way, say, writing blog posts like this ;-)
